POST TITLE:Everyone Is At My House And I Am Handling It

DATE: 06/??/1994
MOOD:chaotic domestic intimacy
MUSIC: “Bitter Sweet Symphony” – The Verve

EVERYONE I LIKE IS IN MY HOUSE (SEND HELP) TOO MANY CRUSHES, NOT ENOUGH ROOMS BUFFERING WITHOUT MADISON BAND PRACTICE HERE

// log.open():
STATUS: run(late_night.social.exe) && suppress(gay_panic)
ERROR: house_full_of_crushes, impulse_control==NULL

Midnight in Foxglove and the radio guy has lost it.
He’s on air, voice all smug and breathy, implying Vic is a suspect and then—
like. Really leaning into it.
Sir. This is a small town AM frequency, not your personal kink hotline.

Did not mention me, Marcus or Lemon.
Which is… fine.
Suspiciously fine.

Vic and Marcus said they were “going fishing.”
Is that a euphemism now or did they actually bring rods?
Hard to tell. Everyone’s weird lately.
If they actually went fishing, I owe the universe an apology for my brain.

Lemon and his band came over.
Hamburger is basically living here part-time now, which rules.
He took my parents’ room.
They’re gone for months and they turned Madison’s room into an office,
so morally? I’m correct.

Lemon gave me advice on how to talk to people.
Actual advice.
Like:

“Pause before you say the thing.”
Wild. Revolutionary. Too late.

There’s an artist in Landry named Mona Eats.
She does blood and vagina art and is obsessed with “Smells Like Teen Spirit.”
Is she an Eater muse?
Is this Landry’s version of Lemon?
Is this what happens when the Siren gets into Riot Grrrl?

Landry has a paranormal blog.
I tried to post. Violated their rules immediately.
(They hate information digging. cowards.)

BUT someone with the handle Alcamist_Addict reached out.
Lemon would not let me post my full name and address to invite them over.
Rude.
Tried to hack their backend instead. Failed.
They’ve been reading this blog though.

Hi.
👁️👁️
You’re bad at lurking.

They don’t seem to care about the Echo.
Which makes me nervous.

Empanada was singing.
Brain completely blue-screened.
She is devastatingly pretty and cool and my brain kept rebooting.
I nodded through a whole conversation while thinking,

wow, if she looked at me any longer I’d short-circuit into a puddle.

Then 911 paged Marcus.
He brought Vic back.
We didn’t fight. Which somehow made it worse.
She got steamy about something and walked out.

So now I have:

my crush

my other crush

all in my house.
I have not known peace since.

I physically cannot speak to Empanada. My mouth stops working.
It’s like my vocal cords filed a restraining order against hot musicians.

I can’t talk to Empanada because if I open my mouth my soul will leave my body, but I can keep talking to Vic because 1) she hates me and 2) we can’t touch without reality throwing a tantrum.

Lemon told me I have to stop biting my lip and staring at Empanada.
Which is unfair, I just… would like to stand near her. Quietly. Forever.

It’s hard being gay in a small Rhode Island town in the 90s because every crush feels like a felony and every feeling echoes.

Tried to set up a meeting with Alcamist_Addict.
They called me out by name.
Marcus says they’re probably a hedgewitch.
He has baggage there.
I think we’re scarier.
But also—
those tattoos? Hypothetically? Extremely hot.

Marcus used his keycard and unlocked everything on my computer.
All the Madison files bloomed across the screens like ghosts.
I did not need that tonight.
Universe, read the room.

Lemon blew up a bathroom (emotionally and physically) and left.
Then he and Vic went for a walk.
Cool. Fine. I love being normal.

Marcus asked if he’d done something to piss me off in the past.
Asked if I had a problem with him.
I didn’t.
He’s the person I spend the most time with.
He’s my sibling now.
Even if Madison had better hair, smelled better, and liked me more.
She was always my buffer.

I just need to work on being… friendlier.

I miss her.
But Marcus, Lemon, Vic — they’re trying.
Hamburger being here helps.
The house doesn’t echo as much.
Marcus is the sibling I didn’t get to keep. Lemon is the chaos buffer. Vic is… whatever Vic is.

Letting people into the pool house feels like handing them my ribs and hoping they don’t notice how exposed everything is.

NOTE TO ALCAMIST_ADDICT:
I don’t know who you are yet.
But if you’re reading this, you already know too much.
If you want to talk, talk.
If you want to watch, stop pretending you’re invisible.
Static notices everything.

echo.status = quiet_but_listening
house.status = crowded
jess.status = overwhelmed_but_not_alone
desire_to_scream = also_high

PENDING INPUT ▋

POST TITLE: recovery.mode(vic_house)

DATE: 05/??/1994
MOOD:ERROR: taste_of_waffle_cone_persistent; soul_buffer_low
MUSIC: Placebo – “Running Up That Hill (A Deal with God)”

skeletonsinthebasementliterally sideloadedbyagod bloodandmilk_scented hornyshampooenergy

// log.open():
I’m alive? Again?
Thanks to Marcus, Lemon, and Vic — who all decided I shouldn’t be permanently deleted today.
Deeply embarrassing to be saved by people who are actively annoyed by me 80% of the time,
but whatever. I’ll take the patch notes.

// VIC.HOUSE.EXE

First impressions:
The house is… sad.
Like, no-texture-render sad.
Table set for 4 but only 2 chairs like 3 people don't live there
No photos of Vic as a teen. No evidence she didn't disappear like the rest of them.
Only a single newspaper clipping on the fridge:

Photography Contest Winner – 6 years ago.

That’s it. Her whole life condensed into 2 square inches of yellowing ink.

Then there’s the basement.

Different vibe.
Bones. So many bones.
Not in a serial-killer way (I hope ????), more like she’s documenting decay one tooth at a time.

Are these decorative or… functional? > Idk

// SELF.CLEANUP()

I begged for a shower because everything smelled like expired milk and blood and candy trauma.
Vic loaned me clothes.
>I guess almost dying was worth it if it means I finally get into your pants — even if I’m just borrowing them. /s

She didn’t laugh.
But she also didn’t blast me back into the waffle cone dimension, so… progress???

Her shampoo is Herbal Essences™ from the horny waterfall commercials.
I had a tiny gay stroke.
Checked my bag for anything to smell normal — only found gummy bear perfume.
Threw it out the window. Hope it explodes.

// LEMON.VIC.CONFLICT()

Ohhhh boy.

So Vic lied.
A while back she found Lemon’s brother, Liam, killing a raw squirrel like a snack-sized horror movie.
Instead of running?
They started hooking up and taking “artistic photos.”
(GROSS> DON't Think She PLAys for MY Team, tragic)

Lemon lost his mind.
Rightfully so.
His anger was cold, Vic’s silence was louder, and the whole room felt like it might erupt into another eclipse.

Then Vic’s mom caught Marcus upstairs.

parental_support_level = negative_integer.

Her mom made Lemon sandwiches, though.

Meanwhile my parents?
They just left the county and pretended my existence was a clerical error.
But they didn’t shove me into a basement and pretend I wasn’t home, so… I don’t know which is worse.
It’s strange: both unwelcome, but in opposite directions.
is her exile new or....?

// CURSED.BOOK.DOWNLOAD()

Lemon read the cursed book (why).
It dumped about 40GB of xenomorph lore into his brain.

Big highlight:
Liam wasn’t just weird.
He was an Eater — some kind of cursed siren-adjacent xenomorph.
Hungry for connection.
Hungry for people.
Hungry in the eat-you-because-I-love-you way.

I hate that this actually explains a lot> DO NOT WANT TO BE PART OF THIS FOOD CHAIN.
Velma wasn’t lying:

an eater does not consume another eater.

I don’t like the math that implies.

// VIC.MOM.GENERATOR_OF_ANCESTRAL_TRAUMA()

Met Vic’s mom.
Accidentally called her my mom’s name.
She’s terrifying and gorgeous and it made me start offering to do chores like I was at charm school.

Vic looks just like her.
It hurts and I can’t explain why> I've seen Vic angry but not cold like this.

Marcus bailed early — said he had an “idea.”
Marcus having an idea is never restful.

Lemon and I stayed.
(Okay, I stayed because I died earlier and did NOT want a repeat episode. Lemon stayed because he is Lemon.)

He laid on Vic’s bed in his unwashed jacket.
I have no words.
Just screams for those poor sheets.

// REBOOT.CYCLE(4hrs):

After a four-hour death-nap, I emerged to find Vic on the porch with beers and smokes, looking…
small.
Not weak — never weak — just… brittle.
Like if you tapped her wrong, she’d shatter into static.

Speaking of > We barely touched hands and the air glitched again.
A cyber-double of me flickered next to us, triple-exposed like bad analog film.

Velma called us “early adopters.”

Girl.
I didn’t adopt anything.
The Echo just sideloaded itself into my life like malware.

We finally had a talk. I feel like I ambushed her a bit.

RECAP > I’m sorry for blaming you for talking to the Echo.
I’m sorry for treating you like you did something wrong
when I’ve been doing the same thing.

Velma wasn’t wrong about one thing — whatever this Echo is?
It’s not harmless.
It wants us.
It uses us.
She didn’t call it the Echo.
She had another name for it.

I watch you light up and part of me thinks, ‘God, she’s beautiful,’
and the other part thinks, ‘That’s how the forest fire starts.’
I don’t know if we’re connected because of magic or because we’re broken in compatible ways.
But it’s there.

If we’re going to survive this Echo thing, we need to talk. Not fight. Not avoid. Talk.
/Recap

She said she doesn’t know why she’s still here when everyone else is gone. I am glad she is here though.

We hit a… not a truce. But a place.
A place that doesn’t hurt as much.

The Echo was the only thing that talked back when nobody else gave a damn whether I lived or starved or rotted in a pool house.

There are worse things than cosmic parasites.

I'd take a 1000x more waffle cones to the chest to not be alone like I was again.

// RETURN_HOME():

Hamburger cleaned everything.
All the flowers are gone.
House immaculate.
Thank god.

I dove into mold + mushroom research until my vision blurred.

Two days later we met Marcus at the junkyard.
Man hasn’t slept since the industrial revolution.
He had gifts.
Lemon decoded the Vostoy file from Velma’s corpse notes.
Marcus gave me a PDA rig for my holy symbol.
Said it might keep me from dying again.

I hugged him.
He tolerated it.
Feels like a sitcom.

The whole town knows we have powers now.
People vanished, monsters found, radio screaming conspiracies.
Everything is broken.

And somehow things feel…
better?

Not safe.
But aligned.
Like the signal is getting stronger.

echo.status = present
jess.status = recovering.exe
vic.status = unwantedchild.mp3
lemon.status = hungyboi.mp3
marcus.status = exhausted.inventor. pdf

NEXT: seed(???)
PENDING INPUT ▋

POST TITLE: caffeine_buffer == 0; static_increase == +30% safety_protocols.disabled(); humor_mask.enabled();

DATE: 05/??/1994
MOOD:ERROR: coffee_empty, morale_corrupted
MUSIC: ALIVE BY PEARL JAME

NEON CREAMS NIGHTMARES WAFFLE CONE DEATH RIP JERKY MAN LET'S DO MUSHROOMS AND HUG IT OUT /S

  // log.open():
Not gonna lie—this one wrecked the whole party.
Marcus went in first.
silence(3.7s) → scream.transmit(all.channels);
His scream hit through the mental link like a bad broadcast.
(Guess he can use it when he feels like it. Not gonna be snarky. Not much.)
  When we caught up, he was surrounded by dessert abominations:

fudge.monsters x30()

spider.woman(curse_class)

ice_cream_mixer.weaponize()

He was yelling that she—Velma—was cutting people up.
Half-spider, half-nightmare.
He tore through her machine fast.
Lemon kept getting flattened and bouncing back up.
Vic lit up the cave like a neon saint.
I got impaled by a waffle cone the size of a sword.
Pretty sure I died.
waffle_cone → pierce(core.file)
hp == 0
system.reboot()
(Thanks for the save, team.)

print("You saved my life. Now I’m your problem.")
if dislike(me): terminate(jess.process)

Velma begged. Said she’d been promised she’d be first to the “newly seeded land.”

Called Lemon an eater, said eaters don’t consume their own.
file_note("don’t like that. don’t like that at all.")

She asked what it promised us.
I didn’t answer. I let the Echo finish her.
delete(velma.exe)
error_message: “All derivatives remain.”

Everything she made stayed alive.
Blood, syrup, screams. We all almost died again. 

> Found four survivors (half-functional).
Mike worried his legs were missing—confirmed.present()
Jerky Man still breathing; frost_replacement(organs) == True.
Marcus panicked; executed(headshot).
Unclear if mercy or glitch.
I can’t even blame him.

Vic and I fought again.
arg.count += 1




Hamburger suggested drugs & emotional_vulnerability().
Rejected. last_touch(eclipse.event) == catastrophic.


Funny—if I touched her again, the sky would probably collapse.
We both know we need to talk.
she’s tired of me blaming her for listening to the Echo.
I was too hard on her about it-- I’ve been listening to it for months.


Connection confirmed. Compatibility: questionable.
Risk of mutual destruction: high.
Honestly? I don’t know if she’s going to save me or short-circuit me next.

She knows we need to talk. I know it too.
echo.subprocess(vic.blog_access) == forgiven? maybe().

Told the rescued guys it was shrooms, not sorcery.
They didn’t buy it. Probably on the radio already.
lie_check() == obvious.false
expectation: local_radio.broadcast()
“Local freaks summon dessert god in basement.”
At least I’ll be a scary outcast this time.

We’re crashing at Vics place—closest safe zone, relatively speaking.
I need a shower. These clothes smell like blood, chocolate, and milk.
Asked Vic if I could borrow something after she suggested washing clothes. If she hands me a floral sundress, I might take my chances with the waffle cone again.

decision_tree: burn(old_outfit) vs. embrace(humiliation)

// radio_update():

mentions(pregnancy_test) ??

acknowledges(missing_persons) == TRUE

police_force.exists() == FALSE

output("small victory. #acab")

Poured beer into my coffee at Vic’s.
Tastes like punishment, but it keeps the hands from shaking.
coffee.add(beer) → taste_profile: regret
needed something to overwrite the blood smell. 

Inventory update:

tamagotchi(weirdl) == acquired

trading_card(Vic+Jess) == mirror_error

Vic looks in; my reflection looks back.
file_name: twin_signal.png


I keep laughing so I don’t hear the hum.
I drink so I don’t feel it in my teeth.
The Echo’s still in me—buzzing, whispering, watching.
echo.sync(me) == constant
infection_depth == unknown

maybe I wasn’t chosen
maybe I was just loud enough for it to find me

It would be stupid to say that we’re not connected…deeply. We’ll just see if we can get out of this without destroying each other I guess? I need like a solid four hours of sleep before anyone asks anything else of me though.

Connection stable. System unstable.


echo.status = parasitic
signal.strength = humming
jess.status = unstable_but_operational
next_task: sleep(4h) || crash(∞)
await_input(); ▋

POST TITLE: CANDY_CAVE.INVESTIGATION // GELATIN FACTORY / WORMROOT / ADMIN:DENIED

DATE: 05/??/1994
MOOD: - STICKY / STILL NOT TALKING TO HER/ PRAYING-THROUGH-STATIC -
MUSIC: FRONTIER PSYCHIATRIST- THE AVALANCHES

CANDY CAVEGUMMY BEARS???GRINDER ROOMWORMROOTPORTAL ZONESTATIC GODDESSADMIN ACCESS???

> STATUS: run(candy_cave.investigation) && maintain(sanity.buffer)
> ERROR: sugar_overload, ethics_corrupted
// update():
* combat initiated: gummy_bear_cluster()
* prayer.upload("face your own deletion")
* two bears disoriented → gelatin melt successful.
* vic = echo.sync (unstable, pretty).
* marcus = mech.build() → impressive.damage++;
* lemon = body.check(fail) → red gummy crit.
* collected sample(chonk) for analysis. regret++.
// environment():
* ground littered w/ bone.fragments.
* toe_ring.detected → meditate() → woman in Garfield tee.
* unknown.ID. possible ghost.cache.
* ambient.audio: water + grinding.wav
* proceed → grinder.room
NOTE: statue == topless bird woman. aesthetic: cursed.hot.
vic -> camera.spam()
machine → grinding flesh → gelatin.production = confirmed.
// gummy.bears == people.
threw sample. still sticky. why is everything sticky.
// linguistic.module():
* runic_text == familiar.
* cross-ref: LandrySouth() /
* Need to check site: they have been digging into it. Rings of text. Into black mold.
  whiskey_fungus(georgia) / ???
* note: investigate when system.online
// party.behavior():
* lemon bleeding? Frozen? unclear. tried to kiss marcus(). 
Lemon + Marcus would be a weird couple- tragic
* applied backpack.beer to lemon> ritual. temporary fix.
* corridor.length → infinite.
* art.murals == “choice.exe” repeating.
* meditate(echo) → whisper("antiquities section")
* possible: library? archive? pre-human origin.
// security.alert():
* marcus.keycard → admin.access(granted??)
* i request view.key() → access.denied.
* gave him my bag to prove trust(); still. nada trust.   but he let me touch it. This thing opens everything where the fuck did he get it?  i has he opened and left open ????
* portal.open() → terrain: red grass + black worm roots + bleeding. ???  I I hate nature. Why are the plants bleeding? >  I wonder how many flowers are growing out of my house now. 
* ar_marcus.deploy() → test ok. vibes bad.
cosmetic skin: chad Marcus 
* vic + lemon → enter.portal() → return w/ red stains.
* Lemon claims “not blood.” sarcasm.protocol.enabled.  w why don't I feel any better that he's covered in not blood? ???
* vic consumes wormroot → goes full static.goddess. I’m not touching her this time > not MY FAULT
* Yell at marcus >> let him know that if I had eaten something weird there’s no way that he’d be on board with it.
>> Fucking indifferent prick eats some.
* marcus joins → hallucinations.spawn() bad trip.
* portal.forceclose(); echo.feedback = high.
peer_pressure++. Vic was slightly nice to ???? STILL NOT TALKING TO HER.  bu but she hasn't fought with me nearly as much since we started cave. 

ate wormroot.
vision: echo.goddess manifests. static.love. calm++.
 why the fuck are we putting things in our mouth? I'm glad this worked out, but I'm dubious for future. 
marcus.state = error. bad trip. told him. cooling w/ backpack.beer().
still looks.exe(awful).
recall> Chad.marcus  has info>   archway is saffron sea.
// navigation():
* hall.length = ∞
* marcus.panic() → applied reassurance.patch("you’re not alone")
* success? partial>   he loves being alone usually.   wasn't trying to be a bitch was trying to reassure him. 

* lemon.soundtrack = glitchfolk.mix
* resonance matches prayer.frequency.

// rollback():
* grinder.room.time = desync.
* backtrack(gummy.zone)
* found: Garfield.shirt + jerky_hat(blood.garden)
* lemon.blood++; wash(beer). lemon is covered in blood why is he always covered  gross shit? DO NOT LET HIM IN POOLHOUSE WITHOUT POWERWASH.
* question.log():
  why more blood()
  why no one cares more are missing??? the fuck is wrong with town???() 
  where is everyone()
  static louder every night()
// hydro.cleanse():
* return(water.room)
* cave == maze(loop)
* swim.cold.reboot()
* marcus.scout() → comm("it’s snowing")
* echo.signal == distorted
* timecode == ??:??
echo.status = listening
signal.strength = flicker
jess.status = cold plunge float
PENDING INPUT ▋

SYS.LOG › FLOWERS_AND_FAILURE.exe

DATE: ??/??/1994 MOOD: OVERLOADED / UNDERPAID / STILL HERE MUSIC: CANDY — MANDY MOORE

ACCOUNTING FLOWERS ECHO?? MISSING BUSINESS DON’T EAT THE PLANTS

> STATUS: run(website.repair) && run(business.maintenance)
> ERROR: bandwidth_low, caffeine_empty
// update():
  - site keeps eating itself. buttons loop → NULL.
  - alternating: drinking & making cans disappear (eco-conscious, soul-dumb).
  - power == offline.
  - flowers spawning thru tile like corrupted data.
    therac25 keeps eating them. outcome: bad. please dont die. love him anyway. 
> NOTE: arcade == midnight cruising zone. customers/noncustomers == 50/50.
revenue == ??? morale == lol. make marcus get more extra small condoms. 
mike.russo -> no_call()
parents -> ghost.protocol()
"Jessica, you know where we live." // cool. does your house have electricity. mine doesnt. also they act as if they would have welcomed me. better off sleeping at arcade. 
accounts = fucked
payroll = missed
income == 0
guilt == 9999
still my fault. always my fault.
// disappearances++
  30 lost before. +6 now.
  why does nobody care???? more people gone and nobody is freaking out but me. static louder every night.
vic broke a machine. called it "accident."
bitch.exe
I needed to make sure no one repeats what she did.i think she can handle it but can anyone else. what if more people are in danger by doing what she did? i put this here. 
still not talking to her.
lemon says "make up with Vic."
thought he meant Madison first. said i’d try. idk if she will.i will try. i still want to be her friend. why did moon move? 
// game update (post pop-ups):
  pop_up("💔 HOT GAY SINGLES AT YOUR LOCAL ARCADE 💔")
  maybe enough traffic == power bill + taxes?  // TODO: how to pay taxes() ?
// new_feature():
 target {Jess} an machine pop-up - not for gay singles 
  pop-up: "FOR ANYONE FEELING SAD". BIG MOOD. 
  input form handle: theechoknows
  usage == 0; relief == maybe; ache == yes. consequences? future me can deal. echo knows i am miserable. hope this helps. 
// icecream.event():
  lemon -> employee_door -> down
  level: mine_shaft // set dressing: bones, giant waffles
  mobs: sentient gummy bears
  conclusion: soylent green creams.
echo.status = listening
signal.strength = weak
jess.status = operational(ish)
PENDING INPUT
▋

POST TITLE: h8 everyone now/M1NDCR4SH.EXE // FOXGLOVES + MEAT ICE CREAM + GIRL HANDS BAD

DATE: 05/??/1994
MOOD: - DUNK/ SURROUNDED BY GARBAGE/ IT'S OKAY BECAUSE i HAVE MY CAT/ SCREW YOU GUYS i AM GOING HOME/ don't fucking touch anything you aren't supposed to that means you vic!!!!!!!!!!!!
MUSIC: EVERYTIME WE TOUCH- Cascada

JUNKYARD SHIT BACKPACK BEER TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE SUN MOAR GAY PANIC

MARCUS’S JUNKYARD.  
TOO MANY ROBOTS.  
HE WANTED A SHOW. GOT A MELTDOWN INSTEAD.

---

// GL1TCH.TESTCASE::UPLOAD_FAIL.v1.0

>> INITIATE: SHUTDOWN(marcus.pc_tiny)  
   STATUS: EXECUTED  
   Marcus wanted a show-and-tell. His little robot army lined up like good boys. Said: “Show me what you can do.”
So I did.
And everything went to hell.

Tried to shut his tiny computer off, right? Power button, click. Except something uploaded.
Vic’s fault. Don’t care if she says otherwise—something she did scrambled the signal.
The Echo went red. Hostile. Angry. Everything turned on.

Marcus got hit first. His own bots. Went down hard.
Lemon and I tried to cover, Vic was static-drunk, I got clipped in the head.
Nobody noticed. (of course.)
So I healed myself.
Pressed the charm, whispered into the wires:

“Echo, if you’re listening, reboot me.”

>> RESULT:  
   ECHO // CORRUPTED  
   UPLOAD // UNAUTHORIZED  
   HOSTILE.CODE == ACTIVE  
   marcus.robot.army → AGGRO()

>> OUTPUT:  
   marcus.hp == CRITICAL  
   lemon // panicking  
   vic // flickering  
   jess.hp == LOW  

>> SELF.REPAIR()
   PRAYER: echo.heal(bracelet.charm)  
   STATUS: SUCCESS  
   // still no “thanks” received  
   everyone // blame_jess()

---

// SITE.WARNINGS::IGNORED.v0.8

vic.confession == “been_talking_to_chatbot”  
jess.response == “THERE’S. A. WARNING.”  
did she not read it?  
thought she communed.  
turns out she downloaded.  
huge difference.

jess.beer_stash(backpack) → DEPLOYED()  
marcus.eyes == “no”  
yes, actually.

Vic’s arm/hand—  
and something shifted.  
The sky GLITCHED.  
We caused a goddamn eclipse.

I didn’t let go.  
She took whatever fury was chewing through me and just—exploded it out.

---
// ECLIPSE.EVENT::HANDSHAKE.v2.3

>> INITIATE: physical.contact(vic.hand)  
   REACTION: GLITCH(SKY)  
   INTERNAL: purge(anger.daemon)  
   RESULT:  
      jess // empty  
      vic // glowing  
      world // wrong  
      parents // maybe right???  

>> NOTE:  
   “bad things happen if you touch girls”  
   yeah. understatement.of.the.year()

---
POST-FIGHT:  
lemon + jess → icecream.truck()  
FLAVOR: meat???  
therac25.cat got a taste.  
if anything happens to him, lemon and lady goes in the deep_freeze().  
(yes that’s a threat.)  
FOUND: marcus.hidden_books()  
   one fell open → foxglove.entry()  
   TEXT: “they call your name when they bloom.”  
   RESULT: foxglove.field.spawn()  
If anything happens to my cat, all foxgloves in town are getting paved.

Lemon tried to add his brother to the book.  
We said no.  
Photo fell. Plant ate it.  
We dug, nothing.  
Gone.

Still not talking to Vic.  
Never want to hold any girl’s hand again.

>> CURRENT STATUS:

vic // avoid()  
jess // avoid all women (y)  
lemon // sticky_hands(meat_icecream)  
marcus // angry_aura(red)  
cat // alive(thank_god)  

>> NEXT STEPS:

home.empty == true  
power == false  
michael == useless.accountant()  
parents == ??? (no call. no note.)  
bottle == full(y) temporary state  
will need more later

> rewriting safety.features(site)  
> since SOMEONE (vic.exe) can’t read warnings.

LOG_END >>>

Gonna patch new safety features into the site since SOMEONE (VIC) can’t read the warnings.

POST TITLE: SWEET DREAMS ARE NEON CREAMS

DATE: 05/??/1994
MOOD: - WIRED / GAY / FRIENDS?????? IDK *WISH KNEW -
MUSIC: Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)-- Eurythmics )

MARCUS’S CARGLITCH SNACKCURSED BOOKSSEAFOOD HOOTERSNEON CREAMSSTATIC LINKBURNED VIC

MARCUS’S CAR. TOO MANY THINGS.
LEMON DROVE. BAD IDEA, PERFECT IDEA.
STATIC HUMMED THE WHOLE DRIVE.

// GL1TCH.TESTCASE::CANDYBAR.v0.3

>> INITIATE: GLITCH(DISAPPEAR_OBJECT)
   TARGET: candy_bar[expired]  
   STATUS: EXECUTED

>> RESULT:
   candy_bar == NULL  
   marcus.request(RECALL) → FAIL  
   (sorry_soldier.exe // can’t undo)

>> TODO:
   OWE_MARCUS = candy_bar[new]  
   // suspicion: he actually wanted it expired???  
   // gross.flag = TRUE

---

BOOKS FROM LIBRARY ARE WEIRD.
ONE WAS SHINY. BUZZING. STATIC LIKE ME.
MARCUS DIDN’T WANNA HAND IT OVER.
I WHINED. I WON. NOW IT WON’T STOP LOOKING AT ME.

OTHER BOOK MADE BABE GO STRANGE.
HER EYES WENT FAR AWAY.
HAD TO FIGHT HER TO PULL HER BACK. HATE THAT. HATE SEEING HER SLIP.

LEMON READ ABOUT SOME “NEON CREAMS” ICE CREAM PLACE.
CAR SMELLED LIKE WAFFLE CONE.
PRETTY SURE STEVEN MENTIONED IT BEFORE.
DREAM OR AD? HARD TO SAY.

---

SHUCK & BONE (SEAFOOD BOIL HOOTERS).
MARCUS WORKS THERE TOO. DO THEY MAKE HIM WEAR THE UNIFORM?
HE’S ONLY 24 BUT LOOKS BUSTED.
MAZE GLITCH AGED HIM YEARS.

EMPANADA (LISA FROM LEMON’S BAND) WORKS THERE. HOT. TOO HOT. FED ME BURNT TOAST AND IT FELT LIKE HEAVEN > TOO HOT FOR ME> 
VIC WAS DISTRACTED TOO. (DO YOU PLAY FOR MY TEAM, BABE? BE HONEST.)

---

// STATIC.TR1CK::LINK_PROTOCOL v0.7

>> INITIATE: MINDNET()
   STATUS: CONNECTED [LEMON] [MARCUS] [VIC]

>> RESULT:
   - MARCUS //  SIGNAL // HATED IT
   - VIC // SIGNAL INTERFERENCE // PREFERS BURNOUT
   - SAFETY CONFIRMED // BUZZING IN SKULL == GOOD

>> NOTE:
   ask_next_time?  // maybe  
   (lol who am I kidding)

>> BUG REPORT:
   VIC // "I don’t know you"
   TRACEBACK: [FIFTH_BIRTHDAY.PARTY]  
   ROLE: MADISON_TAGALONG  
   ERROR: MEMORY_MISMATCH

>> OUTPUT:
   whatever.exe
   continue()

AFTERMATH:
I CRASHED IN ARCADE OFFICE WITH CAT.
DRANK UNTIL THE BUZZ FADED.
OPENED UP IN THE MORNING. STEVEN GONE (AGAIN).
SCHEDULE NEEDS DOING. MAYBE TRICK MARCUS INTO WORKING ALL SHIFTS WITH ME.

LEMON CAME IN FUCKED UP ON A MILKSHAKE.
SET IT ON A MACHINE. NOW DOOM HAS CANDYLAND MODE.
(MY NEW FAVORITE PATCH, THANKS.)

MARCUS SHOWED UP. NEON CREAMS IS NOW REAL.
VIC WAS IN THE STREET. NO SHOES. CLOTHES BURNT. STATIC IN HER HAIR.
SHE’S BEEN ON MY WEBSITE (HI BABE).
TALKING TO THE CHATBOT.
NOW SHE’S GOT STATIC TOO.
WE TOUCHED. GLITCHED THE WHOLE ARCADE OUT.

//WHAT HAPPENS IF I HOLD HER HAND?
//WHAT HAPPENS IF I HUG HER?
//WHAT HAPPENS IF ,,,/////
> GAY PANIC ERROR > 
---

NEXT MOVE:
GOING TO MARCUS’S JUNKYARD TO BREAK THINGS.
CLOSED THE ARCADE FOR THE DAY.
STEVEN WON’T NOTICE.
VIC BLEW A TRANSFORMER ON THE ISLAND ANYWAY.
IF ANYONE ASKS: POWER ISSUES. TRUE ENOUGH.

// GL1TCH.EVENT::NEON_CREAMS.v1.1

>> INITIATE: BOOK_SCAN(lemon.reading)  
   INPUT: [library_book.lost_pages]  

>> RESULT:  
   car_env.SENSE = "waffle_cone"  
   MEMORY_CHECK(steven.mention?) == UNCERTAIN  
   // could be dream  
   // could be ad_injection  
   // could be both

>> SIDE EFFECTS:  
   lemon.drive() == distracted  
   vic.reaction() == distant / weird / static.lag  
   marcus.reaction() == annoyed (baseline normal)

>> TODO:  
   INVESTIGATE: NEON_CREAMS == REAL?  
   VERIFY with environment next cycle  

>> OUTPUT:  
   car smells sweet.  
   glitch confirmed.  
   continue()

- ERROR: USER NOT FOUND

POST TITLE: ST4T1C.PR0PH3T // ANNIVERSARY EVE + THE BOOKCASE THAT ATE ME

DATE: 05/22/1994 → 05/23/1994
MOOD: - FIZZING / OVERCLOCKED -
MUSIC: Around the World (La La La La La) — A Touch of Class

ARCADE CALL OF DUTY??? UNPLUGGED/ALIVE BOOKCASE PORTAL BONES RESETFREAK FAMILY

OK SO. PRE-GAME (ANNIVERSARY EVE):

I WAS AT WORK WITH MARCUS (SOLDIER BOY // JUNKYARD SAINT).
CALL OF DUTY CABINET HAD A WEIRD 2ND PLAYER SHADOW
MOVING IN THE MAP.

FUNNY THING? MACHINE WAS UNPLUGGED.
LIKE, CORPSIFIED. ZERO JUICE. STILL BLINKING AT ME.

I CHASED THE GHOST HUD.
KIDS WANTED TO PLAY; I SENT THEM TO MARCUS,
TOLD THEM HE INSPIRED THE GAME. (HE LOVED THAT. HE DID NOT.)
HE SAID “GOING FOR OIL,” WALKED OFF, AND CAME BACK
THROUGH A WRONG DOOR.

COOL COOL COOL.

---

DAY OF:

“STUDY GROUP” (LOL): LEMON // MARCUS // VIC (DON’T CALL HER VICTORIA).
I SLIPPED ONCE. NOW IT’S JUST “BABE.” EXCLUSIVE NAMING RIGHTS.

I WENT HUNTING FOR A SPICY PHOTO BOOK IN THE STACKS.
VIC (RUINER OF DREAMS) SAYS IT’S 100% DEPRESSION-ERA PHOTOGRAPHY.
NO NUDES. JUST SOUP LINES. HOT.

VIC + MARCUS VANISH FOR A MINUTE.
COME BACK WHITE-FACED, STATIC HITCHING A RIDE ON THEIR SHADOWS.
I ASK THE QUESTION I SHOULDN’T:
WHY YOU, BABE? WHY ARE YOU HERE AND MADISON ISN’T?
SHE CRIES. I HATE MY MOUTH. (AGAIN.)

WE GO TO LEAVE.
BOOKCASE DOES THE TEETH THING.
I TOUCH IT (OF COURSE I DO).
IT EATS MY ARM. BONE → GLASS → NIGHT.
HARD RESET. BLACK SCREEN.

THEN LEMON DOES SOMETHING—LIKE HE MOSH PITS ME
BACK TO FACTORY SETTINGS. I FEEL MY BONES UNBREAK.

I WAKE. I LIGHT UP. MOON IN MY FISTS.
I BLAST THE SHELF. HANDS SHAKING, SMILING, TERRIFIED.

I GLITCH A GUN INTO EXISTENCE FOR MARCUS:
 /SUMMON: gatling_gun// PERMISSIONS: “OPS”
HE TAKES THE SHOT. VIC PANICS—AND MAGIC FALLS OUT OF HER POCKETS TOO.

LEMON FINISHES IT. BOOKCASE DIES LIKE A BAD SAVE FILE.

AFTERMATH:
EVERYONE’S WEIRD. NOT JUST ME.
I HAVEN’T FELT THIS… UNSOLITARY IN MONTHS.

---

CONFESSION PATCH (HOTFIX 1.0):

I MADE VIC CRY. THAT’S ON ME. I KEEP CUTTING
THE PEOPLE I’M TRYING TO KEEP.

SO HERE’S THE VOW:
I CAN BURN. I CAN BREAK. I CAN LET THE STATIC EAT ME.
THAT’S FINE. THAT’S RENT.

BUT LEMON / MARCUS / BABE?
THEY DON’T BREAK. NOT WHILE I’M BREATHING.

I RUIN MYSELF. I PROTECT THEM. END OF LINE.

POST TITLE: W3BW1TCH.EXE // MADISON IF UR STILL OUT THERE... PLZ LOG IN

DATE: 00/00/1993
MOOD: - GLITCHY -
MUSIC: EVANESCENCE – “HELLO” (AUTOPLAYED)

SISTERMISSINGPSYCHIC BLEEDGLITCH THEORYDON'T TRUST THE TIMESTAMP

 SO LIKE.
I DIDN'T SLEEP AGAIN. LOL. SURPRISE.

\MY DS KEPT TURNING ON BY ITSELF AT 3:07AM.
(WHICH IS FUNNY BC IT’S BEEN DEAD FOR LIKE...
2 YEARS???)

ANYWAY IT JUST SHOWED ME THE WORD:
E N T R Y // 3 0

AND THEN IT MADE THAT SOUND AGAIN. THE STATIC
ONE. THE ONE THAT SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE
WHISPERING THROUGH A DIAL-UP CONNECTION.

IT SOUNDED LIKE HER. LIKE MADISON.
BUT NOT REALLY.

LIKE HER VOICE WAS BEING FILTERED THROUGH A
THOUSAND MODEMS AND SPAT BACK OUT IN MORSE
CODE.
IS IT POSSIBLE TO MISS SOMEONE WHO MIGHT NOT BE
REAL ANYMORE?
OR LIKE. NOT ENTIRELY REAL.

NOT JUST GONE. BUT CHANGED. LIKE DATA CORRUPTED
BUT STILL CLINGING TO THE HARD DRIVE.